I hear it all the time. “I will work with you when I lose 15 pounds.”
I reply, “No you won’t.”
Dead silence. More dead silence.
I finally break the awkwardly long silence. “I’m not shaming you. I am simply telling you that this won’t work.”
“Why?” they say.
“Because, this is what you believe, and until you change your belief, it won’t happen.”
It’s Time to Re-write the Narrative
How long have we been telling ourselves we will do something…as soon as we lose the weight? Months, years?
And what have we done in the meantime? Has it happened?
We may revel in the comfort of putting things off to the future, yet what we are really doing is postponing our present.
We have (and I did it, too) believed this for too long my friends. And it is my belief that we deserve to separate this way of thinking.
What does that mean?
It means to separate your weight from your style. And this involves a lot of unraveling, years of unraveling of what we told ourselves was true.
They are two different issues. You deserve and have the ability to look great at THIS MOMENT. Nobody has the perfect shape, legs, butt, neck, knees, stomach, hair, face, and it goes on. You know this, I know you know this!
We long to get back into the dress, the pants, the skirt that was a certain size (don’t get me starting on size, again, please, you don’t want that) that are probably hanging in your closet and torment you EVERY TIME you open your closet door.
Let’s Examine This Longing
How long has it been since you wore these pieces? When you really examine the dress, pants, skirt, or whatever it is, does it align with your true style? Or, was it something that you thought looked good on you because it was a certain size? Is the cut and fabric comfortable? Is it friend or foe when it comes to dressing for your BODY TYPE?
Really look at this objectively. Pretend this clothing belongs to your daughter, grand-daughter, niece, or friend. What would you honestly tell them? Get some real clarity on why you are giving this clothing the power that is preventing you from moving on and truly embracing your style.
And speaking of giving clothing power, how many of you have clothes that are currently hanging in your closet RIGHT NOW that don’t fit (either too big or too small) and haven’t for a really, really, long time?
And, every damn time you open your closet door, there they are-staring you down, casting judgement and tormenting you. I did it, I did it, too. It would remind me of the scary trees in the Wizard of Oz…with each step I took, the clothing would reach out and grab me in shame.
Isn’t it Time to Feel Good, This Minute?
Yes, all of us are experiencing body image issues and it’s true, our bodies have changed and will continue to change. But why oh why would you stall feeling and looking good?
Our weight is SEPARATE and APART from our style. And when you believe this and start living this, you will be amazed at what happens.
Sure our butt may be bigger than we like, or our boobs aren’t as perky as they once were. Celebrate that there are ways to minimize these imperfections and focus on saying goodbye to invisibility and hello to confidence!
What we wear every day matters. We get to decide how we want to feel when we get dressed. Read this again.
Your style is waiting for you, in all of your glory with the beautiful body you have today!!! Dress her, and love her.
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